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An OK Jew

 

By Peter Yarrow

Not unlike many Americans my age, I was brought up by parents, in my case by my mother, Vera, who embraced her Jewish identity in cultural ways but was not at all observant. Vera came from a family of first-generation immigrants from Russia, for whom pride of having recently come to America was gratefully acknowledged by virtually eliminating all religious and previous national identity from their lifestyle. “We are Americans now!” was their exuberant exclamation of loyalty to this glorious country of opportunity. Furthermore, my mother, being an idealist and born shortly after the turn of the century, embraced a not uncommon notion that religion was frequently the cause of war and, therefore, she eschewed religious observance.

It is no wonder she sent me to “Sunday school” at Ethical Culture, which gave me an ecumenical perspective but did not require me to abandon a sense of my cultural Jewishness; it encouraged a life that corresponded to universally held tenets of ethical behavior.

When I was fourteen my mother remarried, and because my stepfather was all but horrified that I had not been Bar Mitzvahed, I was sent to Central Synagogue to be confirmed. In that context, I had my first meaningful exchanges with religious Judaism through Rabbi David Seligson, who was compassionate and enlightened, and who very much understood who I was. He took my questioning of religious practice very seriously. Actually, I remember, after having delivered my confirmation speech to him and the other members of the confirmation class, asking Rabbi if I would be considered a good Jew if I never entered a synagogue again, or celebrated any holidays, but lived an ethical life. He told me he had to think about that, and that he would give me an answer at next week’s confirmation class. The next week he explained, with solemnity, that I would indeed be considered a good Jew if my actions in life were consummate with an ethical Jewish perspective.

And so it was that my life went on that path, until Peter, Paul and Mary, some twenty years ago, were slated to perform at Carnegie Hall in what was an emulation of The Weavers’ Christmas concert, our “Holiday Celebration.”

It so happened that that concert fell on the third night of Hanukah, and therefore Paul and Mary asked me to write a Hanukah song to add to our repertoire for that night. I didn’t realize it then, but the dialogue about whether I should write that song, within myself and with my rabbinical friends and mentors, would help me articulate my own Jewishness.

Frankly, I had grave doubts about my authority to write a Hanukah song. I began to ask myself the following questions: Would it be presumptuous of me to write such a song? Would it be shirking a responsibility to identify myself as a Jew by not writing the song? Were my grave concerns about the terrible Shatilla-Sabra massacres that had just occurred such that they would color my writing of a song about a Jewish holiday that I understood was in a way about the prevention of an attempted quasi-genocide of Jews? Would I be viewed as simplistic in my understanding of Jewishness if I simply spoke from the heart? Did I need to study before I attempted to write such a song, or were my heart and personal inclination enough of a validation? Finally, I asked myself, was my mother’s perspective a valid one, or was I going to define myself differently as a Jew?

I turned to my rabbi friends for advice.

The interesting turn of events made it clear from all the rabbis’ perspectives, which included those of Rabbi Danny Syme, Rabbi Elliott Kleinman, and Rabbi Alex Schindler, that my particular internal self-questioning and dialogue was so convoluted and so typically Jewish and intense that, besides the fact that I should have no worries about writing such a song (nonaffiliated Jews are still Jews), this internal dialogue was about as Jewish as dialogues get. “Go for it!” they all advised.

The song itself turned out to be a kind of manifesto of my own Jewishness. It pays tribute to my mother and to the perspective of my own evolution as a Jew. I still believe that, primarily, being Jewish means acting ethically Jewish (much more than being observant) and that I am willy-nilly an OK Jew. But if the truth be known, with my mother’s passing, being a part of a Seder or a High Holy Day service has become profoundly meaningful for me. Such observance has become a window to stop the wheels of life from turning at a frenzied speed and a time to contemplate the larger picture of my own life as a human being, as a citizen of the world, and as a Jew.

I cherish these moments now and would still be hard-pressed to define where I classify myself along the spectrum of Jewishness. But I guess my being invited to be a part of the writings for this book gives me one more reason to thank my gracious teachers, who have allowed me to understand the richness of my tradition and its history a little bit better and so bring a greater fullness to my life, as whatever kind of Jew I am, or might be in the future.

The above excerpt, “An OK Jew,” by Peter Yarrow is from I Am Jewish: Personal Reflections Inspired by the Last Words of Daniel Pearl © Judea and Ruth Pearl. Permission granted by Jewish Lights Publishing, P.O. Box 237, Woodstock, VT 05091; www.jewishlights.com.

*********************

Peter Yarrow is a member of the renowned folk singing trio Peter, Paul and Mary and a lifetime activist, mainly in the areas of human and civil rights, the peace movement, and now educational initiatives. He is a contributor to I Am Jewish: Personal Reflections Inspired by the Last Words of Daniel Pearl.

 





I Am Jewish: Personal Reflections Inspired by the Last Words of Daniel Pearl

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http://songeveryday.wordpress.com/

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http://makingprayerreal.com/

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